eHugs

Hugs are the neatest thing ever invented by humans. Research has shown that the typical person needs about twelve hugs per day in order to lead a happy, healthy life. The Internet has allowed people to send messages to one another, but it hasn't been very good at sending hugs. However, a tremendous breakthrough brought about through human creativity now allows hugs to be sent by email. Here what you do:

1. Put you left hand on your right shoulder.
2. Put your right hand on your left shoulder.
3. Squeeze real hard, and say to yourself "Somebody thinks I'm very special."

This isn't quite as good as a real hug, but you can generate an unlimited supply of warm fuzzies in this way. You will then have a ready supply of warm fuzzies to pass around. Don't worry about running out. Warm fuzzies have the amazing property of replicating when shared (they're better at replicating than bunnies), and they actually die of neglect if they aren't passed on. It is theorized that if the warm fuzzy to human population can be maintained at a twelve-to-one or higher ratio, the entire human race will be fused into One Big Happy.

So enjoy a couple of long-distance hugs today, and pass some real hugs along to everyone you can.


Alan Wescoat


This was inspired long ago by a wonderful friend named Melanie. I haven't seen her since her wedding reception. If you're out there, Melanie, email me and say hello.